UUUUGGGGGHHHHH!!!!

Boobie Pancaking..

Boobs are awesome! I don't care if you're a guy or a chick, everyone loves boobs!
If you have boobs, You have more then likely felt yourself up.
My boobs are awesome, I mean they aren't perfect at all. They have breast fed 3 kids and with age and gravity (stupid Gravity) they are not  perfect. But..They are MINE.
As I put on a shirt at night, I tend to feel up my boobies just to make sure there is no weirdness..

Weirdness happened, in the form of me finding a lump..
Stupid lump meant doctor and test. Me no likey either.
Oh and Hospital... eww who the hell would like a hospital..
I adulted and made the appointment.

But when the day came, I no longer wanted to adult..
I wasn't afraid of what they might find.
I just really hate hospitals and test. Especially if the test includes smashing your boob.
I tried everything possible to get out of it. Finally Ingrid drug me there.

So if you have never had a Mammogram or you are the owner of a penis. A mammogram is basically a machine that takes a x-ray image of boobs. It does this by putting said boob in between two plastic plate thingys. This is not as easy as it might sound. You basically get your booby manhandled until its all the way on the plastic plate, then the smashing into a pancake happens. Which honestly isn't painful. The they push a button and BAM, they can see inside your booby.

After having all that fun, I had to do an ultrasound. Which feels so gross.
You see the ultrasound tech comes in and you lay topless.
Then she squirts this warm jelly stuff on your boob..
No I'm not talking about a porno.. Get your mind out the gutter..
The she whips out this probe thingy and rubs it all over your boob taking a billion pics with it.
(Told you to get your mind out the gutter!)
So once she finished doing that, she told me she needs to bring the radiologist in.

Waiting kinda sucked,
I get bored easily, I contemplated playing with the ultrasound machine but..
I'm pretty sure that wouldn't of been a good thing for the machine.
Finally after a million years, the radiologist came in. He whipped out the probe thingy again and then stopped. He started to explain " You see that right there? That is a lump, It will need to be biopsied. Don't worry it doesn't hurt as bad as it sounds. They will schedule you an appointment for a week to do that."
I honestly was so thankful he came in and told me. I didn't have to worry about waiting for results to come in.

So now another wait starts.Hopefully it goes fast! :)
You may ask, why write about this? Why show your drawn boobies?
The answer is easy. I wanna show other woman it isn't as scary as we all think it is. I mean even being there will give even the strongest woman fear. There's this fear of what if I have cancer? What if it hurts?

I wanna tell you, it is not as scary as you think. Yes, you may have cancer, but guess what you are being proactive.Best thing you can do is find out. If you do, you can kick its ass.
A mammogram isn't as painful as you may think. I was thinking OMG they are gonna beat my boobies.Nope it just felt like a hard groping. "If you know what I mean  *insert creepy eyebrow winking*
You feel a bit of pressure, but it is done so fast. Its actually pretty interesting watching the machine.

So ladies make sure you touch them boobies. Do a monthly breast exam! If you find a lump, MAKE AN APPOINTMENT ASAP! DON'T BE AFRAID!
Gents, nag the woman in your life to do breast exams! We must save all the boobies!!!